Writer:
I am feeling overwhelmed by everything. My personal life, my family, work and the world as a whole. I recently was ghosted by someone I was dating, my family back home are struggling with finances due to ongoing medical issues and I feel like I am not doing enough at work or to be there for my friends.

I am feeling constantly anxious and exhausted. The tiniest of mishaps are having a bigger impact than they should. I missed my metro the other day and burst into tears when normally this wouldn’t bother me.

I have tried to focus on things that bring me joy like painting and weightlifting but I am starting to feel myself put pressure on myself to be and do better.

I feel like I am not good enough or doing enough in my relationships, at work or for my family and I am not sure how to reset.

Kate:
Dear Writer,

Thank you for reaching out to us. After reading your message, it seems that you are carrying a lot on your shoulders, feeling overwhelmed by life’s challenges. It is totally understandable to feel this way considering what you are facing.

The weight of expectations and responsibilities, the recent ghosting situation, family struggles, work pressures and overall concerns seem to be a common thread running through your life now. This has obviously had an impact on your well-being. To carry that much on your shoulders seems to be a lot for one person.

Have you noticed the parallel between your weightlifting as a hobby and the weight you are currently carrying on your shoulders? Weightlifting can be understood as a symbol of you trying to take the weight off your mind, trying to find relief from the stress and anxiety you are currently facing. Moreover, the fact you are doing the weightlifting indicates your strength! Both physical and mental. You have already been able to show resilience while doing weightlifting as a hobby, thus I believe you have the inner strength to overcome the difficulties in your life.

It seems like your main problem is the struggle with self-worth and the feeling of falling behind in some aspects of your life. The fear of not being good enough or not accomplishing enough is a common struggle, especially when facing these challenges at the same time. It is okay not to have everything figured out all the time. You are human and we all sometimes feel overwhelmed by what life throws at us. Instead of trying to be perfect all the time, try focusing on self-care and self-compassion. Appreciate yourself for your efforts and accomplishments, no matter how small they can seem.

Consider setting realistic expectations for yourself. The SMART method is a popular method used in the business world but can be also applied to personal life.
Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Relevant
Time-bound.
In other words, set goals for yourself that are clear, attainable and manageable. This means not aiming to solve all your problems at once, but breaking them down into smaller and actionable steps, giving yourself realistic timeframe when to accomplish them.

Remember that you do not have to carry all the weight alone! You do not have to feel ashamed reaching out for support when you need it. Be compassionate to yourself during this difficult time. You have already shown strength in weightlifting and that same strength is there inside you to help you navigate these challenges.

Take care. <3